Universal Messages - How Life's Surprises Reveal Our Inner Work

In this episode, I share a personal story about how the unconscious patterns were driving my behaviour and how to notice and work through them.

When faced with revelations from the universe, it's tempting to shove them right back down where they came from.

Rather than confronting the doubts, fears and lack of trust head-on, we often try and fix things by taking more action!

Or drowning them out with distractions like food, drink, TV, or even more exercise... anything to avoid confronting the discomfort within.

Change is an inner game  - the external world is simply a reflection.

Continually ignoring the whispers of our unconscious mind, inevitably finds us grappling with the same challenges time & time again.

Being a prisoner of our mind without realising we hold the key to our freedom.

Freedom exists when we make peace with ourselves as we are, while also taking deliberate steps towards our desires, dissolving the resistance to life!

By integrating all aspects of ourselves, we free up our energy, creating space to allow more into our lives.

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Transcript

Sian: 0:25

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Vibrant Mind Vibrant Life podcast. Now today I'm going to be talking about, fixing the external, which is what many people do, when it's actually the internal work that you need to do, and how to recognise when that is being presented to you, it's being brought to your awareness and maybe you're oblivious to it. Before I do that though, I do want to share with you something super exciting, something that I've been working on in the background, that is now coming into fruition and I can finally tell you what it is. So to backtrack slightly, over the last few months, I've been going through some big shifts. There's been some big changes happening, both internally and externally. And that is everything from moving house, moving into a much bigger house that is an expansion. It's been very uncomfortable. I'll save that one for another episode. Um, there's been things falling away that I thought I wanted, But came to realize that I didn't. And as they've fallen away, that's made space for new things to come in. So there's been lots of stuff happening. And in that process, one of the things that has been really profound, that has had a big impact on the decisions that I've made, the clarity that I've had, the, the mental, the emotional, and the physical space, is breathwork. Now, you may already be familiar with breathwork. It's something that I've kind of practiced and dabbled in on and off for years, courtesy of Wim Hof. Uh, so I've kind of put YouTube videos on. I've done a couple of classes that have been quite gentle, relaxing kind of breathwork. Anyway, a few months ago, I accidentally stumbled, which I don't actually believe there are any accidents, but it wasn't a purposeful move. I stumbled into breathwork, into some really deep transformational breathwork, and the shifts that I had were big. They were amazing. Just to give you some idea of the kind of shifts I'm talking about. So, my hips For years and years, I've had a kind of a dull ache to them. Most of the time, I'm not even aware of it. You know when you tense your body so much that you don't even realise you feel the pain anymore, because it just becomes normal. Which is often how people live their lives, they become comfortable with the really uncomfortable stuff, and just call it normal. Now, the times that I have been aware of it are when I've gone for a massage and the massage therapist has pressed on that point and it's really brought it into my conscious awareness and I thought, fricking hell, that feels really painful, that muscle is sore. After my first intense breathwork session, the pain, the discomfort, the ache in my hips completely disappeared. Now what I've come to learn is that, as women particularly, we hold a lot of emotion in our hips. So when I learned that, it kind of made sense. Some of the other things that I experienced, I went into the session with lots of questions about the direction that I was going with my business, with my own personal goals, Whilst they had goals, I wasn't really clear on them, and I was feeling a bit of resistance around them. Resistance had been coming up for a while, and it's something that I've spoken about a lot lately, because I'm sharing with you these kind of real life experiences. So this resistance was coming up, and I was pulling everything out the toolkit, so all the, the emotional release techniques, was integrating any conflicts and I also developed Some new, really powerful things, pulling together different parts of knowledge and practices that I have that made a massive difference, really, really huge. It was almost like there was some kind of energy, but I wasn't quite sure what it was or what I was working with. And that breathwork session almost like pulled the plug on it. It was a bit like, deflating the balloon. the space that the balloon was taking in my energy field deflated and it made way for new energy. And that new energy came in the form of clarity. It was after the breathwork session that I recognized what it was that I actually want. I had clarity about where it is that I'm going. Complete clarity. And it felt so freeing. Now the breathwork journey didn't end there. I went on to do some more sessions. I explored it, the different practices that are available. And I made the decision to become a breathwork facilitator. So this is now something that I am incorporating into the work That I already do to tap in, not only to the mind and the emotional body, which is connected to the physical body. You know, our emotions have such a big impact on our body and our body is also a really powerful tool in and of itself to help us to release the things that are stuck. So even when we are able to mentally do some work, emotionally, do some work, when we have these experiences, when we have any kind of trauma, no matter how big or small the trauma may be, the body holds on to that memory at a cellular level. is a really powerful way to tap into some of that stuff that's unconscious, yet the body is storing it and use the breath to release it. So I am so excited to be able to bring this to you. I'm going to be running some in person events to begin with, which I'll, I'll put the link in the show notes. the breathwork that I'm going to be doing is breakthrough breathwork. So this is using your breath to really break through some of those barriers, to uncover those unconscious patterns, to resolve them, to integrate them. It's going to be using shamanic tools. It's going to be using music, the breath. I'm going to be incorporating hypnotherapy, poetry, all sorts of tools to really support you in having the most amazing, the most powerful transformation in a really safe space. So if you want to find out more, head to the link in the show notes. I am going to be bringing the sessions online very soon. So If that's something that you're interested in, drop me a message, come and join me, I would love to have you there. Now there is something else coming very soon that I am so excited about. Uh, I really want to share it with you now. Shall I share it? No, I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait. It's, uh, there's a few pieces that are falling into place. So when I have those final pieces in place, I'll share with you something else that is completely different, that is going to be coming out soon., again, all prompted off experiences that I've had myself recently, where I've broken through, not only internally, because we can have these internal breakthroughs, and that is wonderful, that is, that is the power. I've gotten to the point now where the outside world is beginning to reflect those changes quite dramatically and quite quickly. And whilst that's exciting, because it's lovely to have it reflected back at you, in a place where that doesn't even matter because I feel so good internally. I feel so good inside me in the direction that I'm going. That's what I'm excited about. So, anyway. On to today's episode. We will get there, I promise. Now, this episode was prompted off the back of me having a big swollen knee. So over the recent months, I found that my knee has been playing up a little bit, which I'd attributed to years of, you know, teaching Zumba and doing hip training and carrying out lots of activities that maybe aren't the best for your knees. So anyway, my knee had been a little bit troubling, a bit clicky at times, and I hadn't been able to kneel properly in yoga, so it's been kind of ongoing for a while. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I went to the gym to play squash. And my knee did not like it at all. Afterwards, it ballooned up. I could barely walk on it. It was just really, really massive and swollen. So I went to the doctors and they said yeah, it's fluid. Go home, rest it, ice, have some anti inflammatories and carry on with your life. So, went home and accepted, okay, I've got to sit still for a few days. Not ideal, but, you know, it is what it is. It was uncomfortable to walk anyway, so, okay. Roll forward a few days, maybe even a week, and my knee was still swollen. It hadn't gone down at all. And that whole exercise of sitting still, or lack of exercise, I should say, that sitting still, was really uncomfortable for me. I didn't like sitting still every day. Now, I like to go out walking. I love fresh air. I love moving. I love yoga. I love, you know, I, I enjoy being physical. And not being able to do those activities, didn't just feel uncomfortable. What I found is that I was actually then judging myself. It caused me to really go inwards because I felt like I was failing. I felt like I was a bad person in some way. I didn't feel like me. and I didn't like who I was. I didn't accept myself fully if I wasn't active, if I wasn't exercising. Now, what I attempted to do for a short while was control the external circumstances, Which is what we as people often do. We focus on controlling the external circumstances. And usually things that are completely outside of our control. And that control is driven by a lack of trust, by fear, by self doubt. And here's the thing, trust is an internal game. Yeah, instead of focusing on that internal game and exploring what it is that might be going on, it can seem easier to focus on fixing the external, To do more. To achieve more. To maybe prove that you are enough. Now when this happens it's resisting life as it currently is, so it's pushing against how we're feeling in that moment, thinking that it's wrong, that we need to fix it by taking action, to prove to ourselves, to prove to other people that it's not true. That's the ego kicking in. It's the shadow self. So the, the shadow being the things that trigger you in other people. The, the judgments that you make. The things that you avoid or deny about yourself. Let me give you an example to bring that to life. Imagine in your workplace, there is somebody who you think doesn't work hard enough. Or maybe they don't finish early, or they arrive late. Whatever it is, in your world, they're not, they're not pulling their weight. And as a result, you judge them, or they annoy you. You think that they are lazy, or they're bad, or whatever label it is that you give it. When you're in those moments, when something triggers you, when you're making a judgement, what's really going on is you are repressing the part of you that is lazy, And this is because at some point in the past, you will have been in a situation where you were shamed or you felt that it was wrong to be lazy, so you pretended that's who you aren't. So you took that part of you and you repressed it. You hid it away because you didn't want to identify with it. Roll forward to today when you're in the office. And you're judging that person that you think is lazy. And the reason that you're doing that is because you don't want to think about yourself, or you don't want other people to think that you are lazy. Because in your unconscious mind, you attribute being lazy as being wrong, as being bad. So you pretend that it's not who you are., and the way that you do that and prove that you're not lazy is by doing more, focusing on the external actions rather than dealing with what's really going on. so during this process of having a swollen leg, which I still have by the way, I had a moment where I couldn't move and felt really uncomfortable. so the question that I asked myself in that moment was, who am I when I'm not active, when I'm not moving, when I'm not walking, and how do I feel about that? Yeah, what would actually happen to me if I didn't do this stuff? And let me tell you, it brought some things up. Things that I, I was completely oblivious to. What it revealed to me was that unless I keep myself in shape, unless I prove myself as a human through being active, I felt like I wasn't lovable. And I had no idea that was going on. There's a quote from Peter Crone that I absolutely love, which is something along the lines of, life will present you with the circumstances and the people to reveal where you're not free. And that's exactly what this experience did for me. I was a prisoner of my own thoughts and I hadn't even realised it. Now whilst I love exercising, I love walking, you know, I'm a big advocate of keeping yourself fit and healthy. I found that I wasn't okay without it, and not being able to do it, the meaning that I applied to it, and who I believed that made me as a person. And what it said about me, and all of these things came to the surface that I was just completely unaware of. And what that can do is then send your nervous system out of whack. So you begin to feel unsafe in your body, and this is often when people will revert to behaviours to numb how they feel in that moment. So rather than dealing with what is this stuff that life has presented to me, this circumstance that feels really uncomfortable, this situation that I'm going through, this experience, this interaction that I'm having, that I'm not sure how to navigate, instead of facing it head on and seeing it as the gift that is revealing to you what has been keeping you stuck, and not just in that area, you can guarantee it's happening in other areas, but instead of going there, they find temporary relief Through eating, through drinking, through watching TV, through doing whatever it is, because that feels good in the moment. It can feel like it's easing the emotions that come to the surface, when really, it's just pushing them down further. And the thing is, when you push something down, it's gonna come back up again. And then life becomes a bit like a whack a mole. So you whack it in one area, you push it back down, and it pops up in another. And you whack it back down, and it pops up in another. So, whilst it may bring that temporary relief, just keep in mind that it is temporary. Now the work was then to look at what's behind that, what are the emotions that I'm feeling, and then make peace with it. The way that I do that personally is through recognising what are the emotions that I'm feeling, using the emotional release techniques, Using the processes that I've put together to be okay with where I'm at. To get rid of that resistance. To actually embody the knowing that wherever I'm at in that moment is absolutely perfect. And this is true of everybody. And the other way that has really supported me recently is of course breathwork, which is why I've chosen to take that to the next level. Now, when this stuff comes up, there can be almost like a desire to rationalize our way out of it, to think that we know better. I'm going to give you an analogy to bring to life why rationalizing your way out of stuff doesn't work. Imagine a member of cabin crew stepping onto a flight for the very first time. It's their first flight ever. And that member of cabin crew goes to the pilot who has been flying planes for, I don't know, 25 years. They know what they're doing. And the cabin crew tells the pilot what he needs to do. He tells the pilot, I think these are the decisions that you need to make. This is a bit like the conscious mind telling the unconscious mind, telling the body that it knows best, wanting to control things. Now that member of cabin crew in that moment doesn't have access to all of the knowledge, all of the embodiment of flying, the integration of flying, the years of piloting, the access to all the systems that see the flight paths and everything else, the much bigger picture of what's going on with that flight going out. Yet, through their desire to control, they attempt to tell the pilot what to do. Now if the pilot listens to that member of cabin crew, then who knows where the plane is going to end up, or if it's even going to take off in the first place. this is where trusting the stuff that comes up for you, knowing your unconscious mind is revealing to you what it is that you need to work on to be able to achieve your desires. It's bringing to your awareness the obstacles that are preventing you from having exactly what it is that you want. And then this is where you can use the tools to support you to get there. The tools that can help you to regulate your nervous system. So you're no longer in that stress, that survival mode. You can begin to relax. And when you relax, you trust the pilot or the universe, the higher self that knows what to do and that it's safe for you to go there., If you believe that you are not safe, then your nervous system is gonna respond to that Energetically, you're gonna be pushing it away. Only when you've integrated those parts of you so maybe the part of you that is hardworking and the part of you that is lazy so they can coexist together because they both bring things to the table. You then make space in your energy field to receive what it is that you want. And that is when things begin to shift internally, and the external world begins to reflect that back at you. So I hope you found that useful. If you are interested in joining me for some of the Breakthrough Breathwork sessions, let me know. if you can make it in person, that'd be amazing. And if not, there are the online sessions. And the thing that I really love about this this is that it makes it accessible for everybody. Where coaching can come with a high price ticket in comparison to maybe some other services, breathwork is super duper affordable. So if you're at the place where you're exploring the whole personal development field and you want Just have that experience here. What does it feel like to actually begin to shift energy within your body? Then maybe this is the starting point for you, okay? Maybe it's the next step on a journey that you've already been on. It certainly was for me. So wherever you are right now is perfect maybe breathwork is something that will help you to alchemize, to expand and to shift energy in a new way. Anyway, have an amazing week and I'll see you next time.